As I walked past the local school, I suddenly had a flashback to my school times when I remember a group of girls telling me they no longer wanted to hang out with me. I hadn’t thought of that scene for a long time so was surprised to see its surface.

When working with clients, often there are times where scenes of school come up. It’s an informative time where comments or actions from people can have long-lasting effects. Sometimes there are extreme cases of bullying but it doesn’t always have to be. Sometimes the person who said the comment will forget about it as quickly as it was said, yet it depends on how the person receiving it processed it.

My teacher Marisa said that most often issues boiled down to 3 things – “I am not enough”, “I don’t belong” and “What I want is not available to me”. Sometimes when we try to belong too much, we give up aspects of ourselves in order to fit in, we end up pleasing others and not doing what we really want but rather do what others expect. This can sometimes lead to stress and feelings of anxiety.

The good news is that school is over for most of us, all the child and teenage angst and fears are in the past. We, as adults, can decide what beliefs and thoughts support us and say goodbye to those that don’t.

What school scenes do you remember?