I was watching an episode (1) of Fab Five, Queer Eye on Netflix where Antoni was telling Wanda that she reminded him of his mum. He was recalling when he asked his mum “Why don’t you say I love you?” and she would reply “I don’t have to say it, I do it with my actions”

I had a pang moment. Wow, imagining thinking that your mum didn’t love you. (2). It reminded me how important knowing the 5 love languages (3) are. In this case, I could very much imagine that Antoni’s is “Words of Affirmation” and his mum’s were “Acts of Service”. So even though his mum was trying to show him her love through her actions, they weren’t being received as love as that wasn’t his love language. He wanted to hear “I love you”.

Knowing your own and your family’s love languages are invaluable. When you know what it is you need, you can tell others and you can give what it is that they need. It helped me become more conscious of what to do for my son because I would hate that he didn’t think he was loved just because our languages were different.

My main love languages are Quality time and Acts of service. 

What are your love languages?


  1. How Wanda got her groove back episode
  2. I’m lucky – I know my mum loves me.
  3. 5 love languages 
  • Physical Touch
  • Words of Affirmation
  • Acts of Service
  • Quality Time
  • Gifts